What Are You Grieving?

We are living in unprecedented times. With very little notice or preparation, our lives have changed in drastic ways. And in the disruption, there is grief. There is opportunity within the challenge to notice what we are grieving as a way of understanding ourselves better.

Are you grieving security, either financial or physical, and feeling really unsafe right now about the future? Are you grieving privacy, now that you are quarantined with others day after day? Are you grieving people, noticing that the loss of being in the presence of others is deeply painful for you? Are you grieving freedom, and find yourself missing out on the ability to go out into the world the way you used to? Are you grieving for the pain of others, and realizing that the daily news of death and infection is bringing up a lot of sadness for you? Are you grieving touch, and missing hugs and intimacy with loved ones is creating a feeling of prolonged loneliness?

Grief is a natural part of life, but we are often trained to not speak of our feelings of loss and sadness. I want you to know that it’s ok to be grieving right now. It’s ok to cry, to feel lonely and afraid, to miss people and to long for that which is currently not available to you.

So today, what can you do to comfort yourself? Take a walk, make a cup of tea, work in the garden, read a book, listen to a podcast or a favorite album, text or video chat with someone, go for a run, have sex, give yourself a really good hug, dance, laugh, nap, sing, try a new recipe, take a break from the news and/or social media, make a gratitude list.

Just please, whatever you do, don’t cut your hair!